Am I a feminist???

Warning: Potentially offensive content!

I’m backkk! Gender-based topics are my favorites and I’m so passionate about them, you could almost feel raw emotions exuding from my write-ups as you read. I’ve been called a feminist serially by readers and I’m just here to clear the air.

People that are familiar with my writing journey before I started this blog know I’ve written an article on this which I titled “Feminism: Unpopular Opinion”. This is like a sequel to F:UO

Feminism is labelled humanity…

To be honest, I’m still trying to understand the concept of feminism because I don’t quite grasp it. No, I’m not a feminist. Sorry to disappoint the Association of Feminists, Semi-feminists, Trying-to-be Feminists, Twitter Feminists, For-the-Gram Feminists, Clueless-about-the-word-but-it-sounds-cool Feminists and the other variants you’d be shocked to know exist. In my defence, I’m more of an agnostic than a believer. I’m still figuring it out, okay? The most dissapointed set of people would be those who are actually the reason feminism was conceived and eagerly wait for me to post an unfair experience as a female then message me with “Feminist, go to hell!”

The “femi-deology” (feminist ideology), as I have perfectly designated it, is laudable. To be honest, I do understand why this evolution is occurring. Women need to be treated better (by both men and women). Someone recently tagged my dreaming big “unnecessary for a girl” and this is just another “Being a Female in Nigeria” topic. My ultimate concern as regards this is our moral standing. Why do we need a label to treat each other equally? Why do we need a formal title to advocate for that which is normal and should always have been? Why do you need someone to say “hey! I’m a feminist” before you can treat them like the humans that they are? Like “Hey! I’m an Arsenal fan and I’d like two cups for my juice”. Isn’t that like pretty obvious y’all need more cups than we do? 😂 (Look I’m also questioning the relevance of this analogy but I bet you already know I’m snarky like that.) When I ask people why they are feminists, they usually reply with “I stand for gender equality”. I am sure to always hit them back with “I am a normal human being who also believes in gender equality”. You do not need the “feminist” tag to clamour for what is right!

The standpoint of religion is really important and I’d be damned not to include findings from my years of research. We could observe how highly women are regarded in the Quran from how Prophet Muhammad (S.A.W) treated his wives. The status of women as defined by Islam is the role of a mother (metaphorically) and it is said that “Paradise lies under her feet” (as reported by Al Tabarani).

The Prophet (SAW) was once asked by a man, “Who is most worthy of my care?” He replied, “Your mother”. The man further asked, “Then whom?” The Prophet replied, “Your mother”. He asked again and the Prophet replied, “Your mother.” He asked for the last time, “Then whom?” before Prophet Muhammad (SAW) replied him, “Then your father.” This highlights how highly women are meant to be placed in the Muslim society…….

Excerpt credit

The Qawwaamah (directing role) which Allah mentioned that men have over women is of protection and maintenance and must not be misconstrued for dominance. Many Muslims rebuff feminism not because they believe men are superior but due to the fact that Islam already protects the rights of women and there was never a need to concoct a movement for that purpose. Anyone who opines otherwise should, therefore, be put behind bars by feminist-police! (And pls don’t exclude those who don’t seek knowledge and mould religion like a malleable clay to suit their selfish interest.) *hits gavel*

I would like to take this a notch higher and remind us the reason for our co-existence. Men and women need each other to live and survive (I definitely do not stand to be corrected). Physiologically, (some) women may not match up the physical and psychological strengths of (some) men. We may not be able to defend ourselves in times of distress. We may not be able to run after a pickpocket who has nabbed our bag. We may not be able to perform our job descriptions fully during our menstrual cycle or pregnancy. We may not be able to work in certain fields not because we’re any less human but the fact that this is the making of nature we have no control over. Same way we could awesomely thrive at whatever we know how to do best and make up for what the men may be weak at. There is no need for a supremacy contest!

Moreover, extreme (or rather, extra-radical) feminists and their precepts of feminism is quite absurd, if I do say so myself. I’ve heard many women say they cannot take their husband’s last name because it renders them inferior. Some do not appreciate simple gestures of affections from their partners such as being held while crossing a road or strolling down a street, having their car doors being opened for them or having their bills being paid for them. It’s not that deep, folks! My wanting to be taken care of doesn’t undermine my strength. By the way, all these take away the seriousness of what is most important (equality). I do not want to be acknowledged with feminism if it is more of the petty things than why it was really propounded!


While I await your backlash, I dare you to reflect on why you’re a feminist.

Yours feistingly,
Fareedah.

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